Friday, June 06, 2008 @9:38 PM
YOU.
what do you expect me to do man?
you dun pick up my calls and you dun reply my messages.
you make my life frantic and so full of question marks.
just a simple message to inform me that there is a change of plans would be very much appreciated.
should i be responsible enough to care when you, on the other hand, dun even bother at all?
i'm so not going to care any further.
and you.
should i feel hurt?
i dunno how i feel each time when you do that to me unknowingly, i suppose
i didn't exactly feel hurt
the feeling is just.. i dunno
perhaps i have so gotten used to it that i have become very numb with everything now.
perhaps i should continue to be oblivious.
perhaps you should just dump me into the bin if you dun need me anymore.
i questioned myself about my existence once again.
perhaps if i have the chance to live all over again,
perhaps if i can unwind all the things in the past that had impacted on me so much negatively in my life,
perhaps if i were stronger enough to disallow all those things to affect me throughout my entire life,
i could have been a very much more normal person leading a normal life and having a normal mindset and attitude; not the weird person whom i am now..
i feel a little better now after letting 1/3 of my unhappy/angry/dejected thoughts out.
i shall keep the rest to myself, as usual.
i'm my own best companion. no one will ever understand me.
argh enough, i'm adversely making myself even more depressed.
elaine's concert is tmr!
i vow it will be the last concert i am going to, at least before december comes.
look at the numbers of concerts which i watched in less than two months,
1) aj band concert
2) cj band concert (cheryl)
3) vj guitar concert (evonne)
4) aj choir concert (wanyi)
5) rj band concert (leonie)
6) st nicks' jubilate concert
7) nj band concert (elaine) ------[pending]
went back st nicks for pop.
mood-less and too tired to go on any further..
just :) to the juniors.
it's their big day today.
:)