ash and bones- what all of us will ultimately end up as.

hmm many things happened this week.

monday- i passed my 2.4 km run!

tuesday- i ended school rather early right after chem spa.

wednesday- visit to OCS. means lessons ended slightly earlier and no cca. but school was so damn gan chiong. die die still wouldn't allow us to miss our last lesson of the day. they did so by shortening every lesson by 10 mins. -.-

anyway, the OCS trip wasn't too bad. the entire place appeared more like a resort to us, instead of the supposed training hell for the officer cadets.
got to shoot the rifle and see how life is like there.
seemed fun and challenging. hmm maybe if i were a guy and alot fitter, i would want to enrol there. haha
anyway, i saw many hwa chong jc and innova jc students there too. and amongst them, i saw hui pei! woohoo.
haha it was a great day i guess. :D

thursday- hmm i embarked on my first gp remedial? haha. actually i felt very much like ponning it cos
1) i ended school at 2.45pm and i had to wait all the way until 5.15pm before remedial started. it was scheduled to end at 7pm.
2) i wasn't feeling very well at first.
but glad that i went with swee lian in the end. it was quite useful and the teacher was nice and comfortable to listen to.
haha :)

friday- i stupidly brought my guitar to school only to realise that there was no guitar prac on that day. so i had to lug it around like how i did last week cos i arrived to school too late to deposit it in the guitar room. D:
anyway, there was parents-teacher meeting in the evening. my mother went. have i said that she was prompted to go cos of my bad results and not-so-good comments?
haha.
she met my pd tutor for 15 mins then left already.
haha after that she asked me why ever since primary school, all the comments from my teachers are always the same or somewhat similar one.
well, it shows that i have always remained stagnant all the while.
never change at all = absolutely no improvement

by the way, besides the gp remedial i mentioned previously, i am also in the physics one.
they call it the Project S.U.E (which in long means Super Useful Enrichment) Programme. -.-
as the acronyms suggest, it is meant for people who got U, S and E for their physics midyears la. haha

singapore garden festival with florence was surprisingly interesting and overwhelming.
and the scent of flowers was very strong and sweet-smelling. :)
shall upload the pictures of the exibition soon if possible.

bad news.

my uncle had just passed away due to an illness.
although i am not really close to him, i still feel extremely sad.
because i thought of my cousin.
she lost her father at such a young age.
at the age of 17.
which is also my age too.

what if
what if one day someone really really really close to me left?
i would feel devastated. scared. despaired. helpless. lost.

:(


i don't want

i'm supposed to be chionging for tutorials and assignments like nobody's business now.
this has always been the case whenever it comes to thursday night.
why?
because the next day is a FRIDAY and friday is a demanding day squeezed with tutorials of all our H2 subjects.

tonight is exceptionally hectic.
look at the amount of homework, tutorials, assignments, essays, ... that are due tmr
- geog assignment 1 (urbanisation)
- geog assignment 2 (limestone)
- AQ essay
- oscillations tutorial
- EoM draft 1
:O and i seriously haven't completely any of the above yet.

i am in a dilemma now.
i have so many things to do that i seriously have no idea where i should start from.
so i will always end up sitting in front of this computer instead.

then here comes a moment when the thought of ponning school tmr starts seeping through my head.
but then, there will always be somethings that i am obliged to do like for example, i promised to pass someone something, i am supposed to do this, supposed to do that.
which in the end leave me with no choice but to force myself to go school or else i won't be able to bring myself to go mia with a peaceful mind.
in this case, i can't pon tmr cos
1. maths peer tutoring programme starts tmr and i am a tutee myself too?
2. i would like to hand in my AQ essay on time tmr so that i can hopefully give my tutor a better impression of me?
3. i am supposed to go for guitar prac first then go/ pon guitar prac to go watch cj's guitar concert with cheryl tmr?

argh so what.
i will most likely be going to school tmr after all. :(
with nothing done. (okay except, perhaps, my essay)

-


:(

"no matter how MOUNTAIN big the problem is, as long as you view it LIKE ANT-SIZE, then you will be a happier person."



i am never fully aware of what my real problems are. perhaps i do view my problems like ant-size sometimes.
there must be many many ants crawling within me every now and then.
but good to say, i don't feel their presence right now.
haha



thank you. :)

this week,


i feel happy because

- there was no school on monday, very much thanks to youth day ---> thus it's a short short week
- i have been seeing the small small but smart and fast cheryl joy goh for almost every single day
- i had my first blood donation in my life on wednesday ---> i saved lives
- i bumped into yushi and jermaine at amk hub on wednesday too
- janice gave me a narnia postcard yesterday
- my guitar sectionmates are a bunch of crazy, friendly and hilarious people
-{edited} st nicks band got GOLD FOR NBC! :D


i feel sad because

- i lost my GP black file in school
- i lost my tie in school too
- my ulcer still refuses to go away
- i have flu today + no shuttlecocks = badminton date with cheryl liu is cancelled once again


i look emo because

- i am tired
- i am sleepy
- i don't feel like talking sometimes
- i don't like school
- i badly wish that there is no such a subject called project work that exists


what will we be doing 10 years down the road?
"we will be enjoying coffee at starbucks. no longer be drinking from the uncle mobeen's cos we will be much richer by then." -cheryl joy goh
:D



short and simple summary of the week.

the past three days were very fulfilling.
basically, the three days were spent on 70% work and 30% play.
haha must emphasise more of the work and less of the play.

on sat, went j8 with florence and cheryl joy.
lunched at sakae. then stayed at mos burger to study.
then went to play arcade with cheryl.
it was damn fun and hilarious playing with her who had been deprived of all the fun for the past two weeks due to lung infection.
haha she even managed to get a stitch stuff toy with just one try.
then back to study with florence again.
haha i must say it was really really one of the most enjoyable day of my life. :D

the next two days were spent studying with flo again at novena and causeway respectively.
rather productive. managed to get most of the work done.
haha it brought us to a simple conclusion/equation,

long weekends to look forward to!
i didn't know there is a youth day holiday on mon until fanny mentioned about it yesterday.
i feel extremely delighted already at the thought of not needing to step into the school for the next three consecutive days.

let's see how much work i have to do during these three days:
-GP essay corrections
-chemical energetics 1 tutorial
-motion in circle tutorial
-graphing techniques tutorial
-20 plus newspaper articles mindmaps/reflections (impossible)
-EoM xP
-redo maths midyears questions
-read up the entire chapter on rocks and weathering seriously
-revise abit on physics

study study study. this is the kind of symptoms i am experiencing after taking back my mid years papers.
i can't say i am completely demoralised by the grades i am getting since i have never really bothered about how bad my results are. i am just a little more motivated to study now. haha

other things i want/would like to do during the three day break:
-play badminton
-practise guitar
-finish sewing my latest new born "child" haha
-sleep sleep sleeeep

okay talking about sleep, i really feel damn sleepy now.
zzzzzzzz

i realise i generally tend to blog whenever i am feeling either too happy, too sad or too angry.
so you can probably know how i have been feeling, judging by how frequently i have been blogging nowadays.

perhaps it will be good if i can blog less often.
but it will only occur when i am too comfortably contented with life now that i have nothing to blog about or simply when i seriously am too busy to even have time to vent any forms of emotions onto my poor blog.

at the present, it is totally impossible for me to resist doing so.
my feelings have basically been alternating among the three (too happy/too sad/too angry) all this while.
and i tend to keep most of these feelings to myself cos to me, i think it is useless to tell everybody else about them when i know the problem lies deep within myself.
i am glad i found someone who is stuck in the similar situation as well.
so she's like my other channel for me to share and relate my problems with besides my blog. haha
or else i would have suffocated to death.

i had a chat with my ex-colleague (haha, i sound like a professional working adult) on msn last night.
it was interesting to note the kind of misperceptions he, or any other people who don't know me well, had of me.
it can be amusing sometimes when what they think of you doesn't exactly fit the real you at all.
i just wanna say i'm quite amazed with the art of masking although it isn't really intended for most of the time.

-

i gave myself lots of excuses to divert my attention away from my chem tutorial when i was doing it just now.
hmm that's bad.
but i seriously need to go to sleep now.


five hours weren't enough

celeste
201191
-hebe fanatic
-die-hard fan of spongebob squarepants
-admires captain jack sparrow


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